Thursday, January 31, 2013

A Day on the Web (and one last night of 30 rock)


1. Crime of the Day


Perhaps.. of the Century..



Osmer Hernandez Arrested After Serenading Cops In The Nude


The Huffington Post | By David Moye Posted: 01/30/2013 10:59 am EST | Updated: 01/30/2013 1:02 pm EST

New Orleans is known for its rich musical history, and Osmer Hernandez might be part of that tapestry.

When cops encountered the 33-year-old Hernandez staggering down the street on Friday night, he serenaded them with a ditty, according to BayouBuzz.com.

What made his performance memorable, however, was his lack of clothing. Cops say he wasn't wearing pants -- and he was masturbating.

Officers asked him to put on the shorts he was carrying, but Hernandez allegedly ignored the order, preferring to fondle himself, according to NOLA.com.



Ok.. this begs the obvious question... what song was he singing? Should we have a little "caption contest" if you will? I'll get the ball rolling (so to speak) with a few options..




1) Willie & The Hand Jive

2) We Got The Beat / Beat It Mash-up

3) Somewhere Over the Rainbow


2. 2nd Best Crime of The Day


From our "genetically pre-disposed to liking chicken" correspondant...


no story, just a screen grab.. but I think it says quite enough...






In their defense.. the superbowl is this Sunday..



3. Study of the Day



From our "get in the kitchen and get me my big piece of chicken" correspondent



Want to have more sex? Men, stop helping with the chores





This is probably not considered an aphrodisiac by most, but the divsion of household chores may play a role in …No good deed goes unpunished.


That famous phrase from Clare Booth Luce apparently applies to married men, according to a new study that finds men who help with the housework tend to have less sex.


The University of Washington research, published Wednesday in the American Sociological Review, suggests that heterosexual couples have more “sexual encounters” when each partner takes on traditional gender roles.


“Where the male is doing the male tasks and the female is doing the female tasks, those are the couples (who) are having more sex,” UW Associate Professor of Sociology and study co-author Julia Brines said in an interview with the Toronto Star.




What about couples where the male performs no tasks at all? Just curious...






4. Website of the Day



From this intriguing list of "Inspiring Websites"

Calm.com

When you need a quick breather, there's no place like calm.com. With a soothing nature backdrop, the site allows you to choose between two-minute and 10-minute meditations, with our without music and auditory guidance.




If only there was an option to have some Phish playing in the background this would be my new homepage.



5. Sad Loser of the Day

Dem's the brakes in the NBA buddy.. I'd feel bad for him but I mean what do you expect rooting for the Pistons..


Pistons fan learns about Tayshaun Prince trade, takes off Prince jersey, lets healing begin (VIDEO)

By Dan Devine | Ball Don't Lie – 4 hours ago


Most analysis of Wednesday night's trades sending Rudy Gay to the Toronto Raptors, Ed Davis, Tayshaun Prince and Austin Daye to the Memphis Grizzlies, and Jose Calderon to the Detroit Pistons has focused on what the swaps meant for the Raps' future or the Grizzlies' present. But the trade also meant something to the Pistons' past — by parting with veteran holdover Prince, the team had finally severed ties with the glory days of the 2000s and (Pistons fans hope) at long last begun focusing primarily on creating some new postseason memories in the years to come.


Still, when a guy's played his entire 11-year career in the home red, white and blue, it's only natural for fans to feel somewhat emotional about his departure ... especially when they only learn about it while sitting in the stands, wearing his jersey and waiting with bated breath for him to emerge from the tunnel, as this Pistons fan did prior to Wednesday night's loss to the Indiana Pacers:





6. Unearthed Tracks of the Day

Early glimpse at Lowell George's work before his Littlefeat days.. cool shit


Lowell George & the Factory – ‘Lightning Rod Man’ (1966)

Those familiar with Lowell George’s work outside of Little Feat generally seem to have a vague knowledge of his production work with The Meters and the Dead as well as a blurry account of his time spent as a guitarist in The Standelles and Frank Zappa’s Mothers of Invention. But far fewer seem to be aware of Lowell’s time as a budding musician on the LA psych scene during the mid 60s, where he played in a band called The Factory alongside future Little Feat member Richie Hayward. The group released at least one single during that period, and also went on to record a pair of tracks with Zappa on production duties, “Lightning Rod Man” b/w “The Loved One.” The first song is like a Captain Beefheart blues tune, ripe with George’s growls and cackles and Zappa’s eery background vocals. The second, “The Loved One,” is more of a 60s psych nugget and features Zappa on prepared piano and Stooges guitarist Warren Klein on guitar. However, these tracks didn’t see the light of day until the 1993 release of Lightning Rod Man, which gathers 15 tunes by Lowell George & The Factory recorded during 1966 and 1967. Listen to both Zappa produced tracks below.



Lowell George & The Factory – “Lightning Rod Man”


Lowell George & The Factory – “The Loved One”



7. Touchdown of the Day


In honor of Dan Marino's "score" if you will.... loving the tweets


Twitter users poke fun at Dan Marino's love child

By DAVID K. LI and HILARY LEWIS

Last Updated: 3:20 PM, January 31, 2013

Posted: 1:59 PM, January 31, 2013

Finally, a Miami Dolphins quarterback is trending on Twitter!

Unfortunately for long-suffering Fins fans, today's tweets are mostly about legendary retired QB Dan Marino and his love child with a CBS Sports production assistant, exclusively reported in today's Post.

Twitter users quickly latched on to Marino’s past work as pitchman for Isotoner gloves.

-- @the_mcgone Maybe you should have looked into picking up a different kind of glove that time, Dan Marino

-- @HumbleSportsGuy Apparently Dan Marino had an illegitimate kid with a CBS employee. If only Isotoner made a brand of condoms, then this could've been avoided


-- @HickamsDictum Isotoner Commercial: " Hi, I'm Dan Marino and if anyone knows the value of protection it's me." Poor Dan.


8. Quote of the Day

I don't know who this chick is... but wow.. was this a fascinating read.



Brandi Glanville: Eddie Cibrian ‘absolutely livid’ about my vaginal rejuvenation surgery

Last Updated: 3:27 PM, January 31, 2013

Posted: 1:55 PM, January 31, 2013


After ending her marriage with Eddie Cibrian, Brandi Glanville decided to go under the knife to rejuvenate her lady parts with her ex’s credit card.

In her juicy new tell-all “Drinking & Tweeting and other Brandi Blunders,” the “Real Housewife” writes that she took revenge on Cibrian over his affair with LeAnn Rimes by undergoing vaginal rejuvenation surgery.


“This pretty intense surgery had an even more intense price tag: $12,000,” Brandi reveals. “A brand-new vagina would be an Eddie-free vagina . . . I decided that since Eddie had ruined my vagina for me, he could pay for a new one. I gave [the doctor’s office] Eddie’s credit card number.”



You go girl!










9. Hard-Hitting News Story of the Day

The tale behind the sandwich: New Orleans' Po' Boy


(CBS News) Home to Super Bowl XLVII, New Orleans is revered for its tradition, jazz music, and particularly its food. CBS News' Mo Rocca took to New Orleans to uncover the history behind the storied po' boy sandwich.


In 1929, during a strike by streetcar workers, brothers and bakers Clovis and Benjamin Martin began feeding the strikers for free. Originally just gravy and meat scraps on french bread, the sandwich was an inexpensive way to feed the masses that the brothers dubbed "poor boys."




I dont know about you, but I'm Hungry



10. Rock On


It's the end of an era tonight on NBC.. and in case you forgot, the internet is here to remind you...


--12 Most Absurd ‘30 Rock’ Moments

--30 Rock Landed on Us (Grantland retrospective)

--The Best '30 Rock' One-Liners

my personal favorite: 'Never follow a hippie to a second location'




--How Jack Donaghy won and influenced people


--From ‘Gaybraham Lincoln’ to ‘Barack A-Llama’: An Updated List of Every TGS Sketch or Pitch on 30 Rock (note the amazing amount of them that are concerned with "farts".. nice job Tina!)

--AV Club's All-Encompassing Coverage




For my part lemme just say that I got on the bandwagon late, maybe season 2, and it is indeed one of the all-time great sitcoms. Of course, the reason it's on that list is because of reasons I dont really care about -- like how Tina Fey blazed trails for females blah blah blah. To me, it was just always a well-written, smart comedy, even if some of the jokes weren't geared to my demo. (Check out that Grantland article for more on its grander context)

But, like most sitcoms, it had tapered off a bit as of late. How many times can you keep going back to the same well before it gets stale? Last season in particular was a bit of a down year, but so far this season has been great. Still, unlike some of my other favorite shows, I'm not exactly sad to see it go. It was a great ride while it lasted, now I'm ready to move on.. I will miss Jack Donaghey, though. Baldwin was just amazing in that role and really carried the show through some down episodes. I'll be watching tonight, but as has been the case for the past few years, I will be looking more forward to the next Parks & Rec..

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