That's one way to even out the ol' onions.

Doctors in Mexico augmented a 45-year-old man's left testicle with an implant normally used for shaping a chin, according to Live Science. The surgery was reported in this month's issue of the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

The unnamed man was born with one tiny right testicle and a normal sized left one. Doctors initially removed the smaller testicle and replaced it with an implant, but that still left him with an uneven pair.

Maybe it's just me, and I can't judge since I have perfectly sized testes...but who undergoes surgery on the balls? Especially for cosmetic purposes? Dude must be getting a lot of action.. or at least a lot of opportunities. I guess if women kept "calling an audible" when they got to the line, maybe I'd go under the knife as well.... maybe not.

2. Sex Shmex

Better Than Sex: Is Music The Answer?

Posted: Updated: 10/26/2012 11:12 am EDT

By: Michael Gowan, TechNewsDaily contributor
Published: 10/24/2012 11:18 AM EDT on TechNewsDaily
Sex and rock n’ roll — no drugs needed. The next time you’re looking to get in the mood for romance, skip the candles. Go straight to the stereo and put on some Marvin Gaye — or the "Dirty Dancing" soundtrack. Really.
A survey of 2,000 participants by music psychologist Dr. Daniel Müllensiefen (commissioned by streaming music service Spotify) found strong—and sometimes surprising—connections between music and seduction. For instance one in three can name a song they like better than sex (Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" was the most frequently named).

1st off.. Bohemian Rhapsody? Am I missing something. Everytime I hear that song I think of Wayne & Garth in their smart car... doesn't exactly get me on the move. But wait! It gets worse.. Another on the list? Bat out of Hell by Meatloaf...... I can think of no other tune that is worse than sex. Hearing that tune makes me limper than an actual meatloaf. We'll have to agree to disagree on that one.


 3. Just in Time for Halloween

-What your halloween candy says about you... 
I'm def this guy:

Full Size Snickers

snickerscandy.jpgOh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you liked making children's dreams come true. You sir are a king of kings
 
 






-The (depressing) evolution of girls costumes 
This says it all (man I hope I dont have daughters)

pumpkin halloween costume

-And The Exorcist redux.. as an 80's sitcom
(only beef.. no Mr Roper!)

4. Star Wars

Cementing their place as the weirdest couple since Seal and Heidi Klum...


Kim K tweets sexy Star Wars pic with Kanye West

  • Last Updated: 12:37 PM, October 26, 2012
  • Posted: 12:36 PM, October 26, 2012

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, before Kim Kardashian and Kanye West turned into the notorious couple known as KimYe, they were just two famous people who worked together for a TV skit. 

Kim Kiardashian via Twitter
"Throwback Thursday me & Yeezy 2008," Kim Kardashian captioned alongside the pic.
 
 And what the fuck is up with the muppet? I dont even want to know where that thing has been...

5. Hooray Beer

And Hooray Chris Cooley for being the coolest motherfucker in the NFL

Redskins' Cooley tried to get 'beer' clause into contract: report

Washington Redskins tight end Chris Cooley tried to brew up a rather unique clause into his most recent contract with the team. The 30-year-old Cooley, who signed with Washington earlier this week after tight end Fred Davis suffered a season-ending Achilles injury against the Giants, tried to get the Redskins front office to include a case of beer in his contract before agreeing to the deal.
“Literally, I have text correspondence trying to negotiate a case of beer into my contract,” Cooley told the Sports Junkies on 106.7 FM. “They wouldn’t do it. I wanted it in writing so much.”

I also heard Brady asked for a similar clause.. but it was for a case of white wine.

6. Like A Virgin

Voting for the very first time.. 


Lena Dunham gets suggestive in 'Your First Time' ad for Obama

Lena Dunham, the creator and star of HBO's "Girls," is no stranger to oversharing — and she's done it again in an ad on behalf of President Obama in which she suggestively describes what "your first time" should be like.
"Your first time shouldn’t be with just anybody. You want to do it with a great guy. It should be with a guy with beautiful — someone who really cares about and understands women."
 

 
 
 
I have to say, Kudos to the Obama campaign for some awesome commercials. First the Sam Jackson 
one.. now this.


7. Inquiring Minds Want to Know

And thankfully.. Kathie Lee and Hoda are there to answer..

Do you talk to your bikini waxer while she works?

Fri Oct 26, 2012 12:44 PM EDT
By Danielle Brennan, TODAY

We've all been there ladies. It's either swimsuit season, a special night or maybe you are one of those women with a standing appointment. And suddenly you find yourself staring up at the ceiling while a technician removes your hair ... down there. 

Never afraid to tackle a topic, no matter how intimate, Kathie Lee and Hoda this morning discussed a survey from InStyle magazine: Do you talk to to your bikini waxer while the job is getting done?


I'd imagine, since it's probably a two hour job for Hoda.. she at least breaks the ice with a lil small talk..


8. Yet another reason NOT to go to Mexico

The horror...

Send in the clowns: Mexico hosts Laughter Fair

 Clowns pose for the official photo as part of the 17th annual Feria de la Risa or Laughter Fair in Mexico City, Oct. 24, 2012. / AP Photo/Eduardo Verdugo

 

9. The LT Ranger

 Which brings me to my next lesson kids.. Don't smoke crack.

Lawrence Taylor Twirled His Used Condom Over His Head “Like A Lasso” After Sexing That Underage Prostitute

lawrence taylor
Barry Petchesky
 
Lawrence Taylor is a registered sex offender after pleading guilty to paying a 16-year-old $300 for sex in a suburban hotel room in 2010. (Both he and the girl say she told him she was 19.) The plea spared him jail time, but now he's facing a civil suit from the girl, who claims he forced himself on her. And this trial is filled with testimony that's both disturbing and darkly funny.

"I know I'm 50-plus years old," Taylor said on Wednesday, asked why he patronizes prostitutes. "I still like the chase, but I like to stack the deck in my favor. I don't like to work too hard."
Yesterday things got grosser. We'll leave this one to the Post, which is tackling the story with unrepentant glee (check that lede):
Today, one of Fierro's lawyers asked Taylor how long it took him to climax while in the "missionary position" with the girl.
"I'm not 100 percent sure," Taylor answered.
After pausing and sighing audibly, he then said: "A couple minutes."
The lawyer, Nathan Goldberg, also accused Taylor of laughing during a deposition when he described how he "twirled" around his used condom.
"You actually testified that you spun it around over your head like a lasso," Goldberg said.
"I didn't know my words would be scrutinized so much," Taylor sheepishly replied.
You are now free to mentally replace iconic memories of Taylor celebrating after a sack with the image of him swinging a full condom above his head.

10. Off to see the wizard

This sums it up quite nicely: