If there's one thing Dan hates more than anyone talking about or acknowledging his birthday, it's actor and silver screen legend, Nicholas Cage. Why you ask? Well, have you ever seen any of his movies? Anyway, as much as Dan hates Nick Cage, imagine how much he hates him now...
Nicolas Cage’s Ponytail Might Just Be The Most Important Thing That Has Ever Happened
2. One Sweet Ride
If there's one thing Dan really likes as much as he hates Nick Cage it's Haribos. And frankly, I can't blame him. I mean, they are pretty much the greatest food on the planet sent down straight from the Gods. In fact, they are so good, why just eat them. Why not encrust your car with them!
Mmmm....
3. O.G.
From our Chronic Iced-T correspondant...
There aren't few people on this planet more "gangsta" than Dan.. except for the original gangsta himself...
Needless to say, it doesnt matter what is coming out of that spicket, I'm drinkin it.
4. Dong vs Jeong
Thanks to my racist round eyes, I always confuse Dan with Ken Jeong. Unfortunately for Dan, he is not a Doctor turned up and coming superstar.. but fortunately for all of us, there will soon be a lot more Jeong in our lives.
Ken Jeong gets his own NBC show about Ken Jeong
For those who have watched Ken Jeong become a focus-stealing presence on Community and in The Hangover films and said, “Yes, more of that, please,” NBC has the show for you. It’s ordered the multi-camera sitcom Dr. Ken,
a comedy based on Jeong’s pre-television life as a physician—a life
that became increasingly, comically difficult because it had Ken Jeong
in it. Every day Dr. Ken Jeong would just try to go about the serious
business of practicing medicine, only to have Ken Jeong show up and
start causing problems. “Damn you and your shameless, occasionally
stereotype-based antics!” Dr. Ken Jeong would yell at Ken Jeong while
tossing aside his clipboard, and now that’s a TV show.
5. A Day in the Life..
I can safely say, of all the people I know, Dan is the closest to one of the great men of our generation, Nick Offerman. Perhaps its their shared love of Bacon, or the McGangbang.. (we know its not the mustache. Dong couldn't grow a mustache with some Rogaine, Chia Pet and Miracle Gro) but Dan does live his life like the manliest man around. Take a look for youself...
6. Brits Love Dong
From our world travel correspondant.. not sure really how this ties in to everything, but the fucking article has "Dong" in the Lead.. therefore.. it must be relevant.
7. Nose He Didn't
If you haven't seen this story, I caution you to tread lightly.. as its pretty disturbing. The funny thing is, its probably the 1,000th most disturbing thing Dan has looked at on the internet today.
The 22-year-old known only as Xiaolian, was involved in the accident last year, but failed to seek treatment. As a result, his nose became infected leaving doctors unable to repair it. Instead, surgeons went with Plan B: grow a new one.
Doctors placed a saline bag cut into the shape of a nose beneath the skin on his forehead.Cartilage from Xiaolian's ribs was then implanted and left to grow over a period of nine months.
5. A Day in the Life..
I can safely say, of all the people I know, Dan is the closest to one of the great men of our generation, Nick Offerman. Perhaps its their shared love of Bacon, or the McGangbang.. (we know its not the mustache. Dong couldn't grow a mustache with some Rogaine, Chia Pet and Miracle Gro) but Dan does live his life like the manliest man around. Take a look for youself...
6. Brits Love Dong
From our world travel correspondant.. not sure really how this ties in to everything, but the fucking article has "Dong" in the Lead.. therefore.. it must be relevant.
Vietnam emerges as UK tourists’ No 1 summer destination
With sales of Vietnamese dong sold to UK holidaymakers this summer
doubled from a year earlier, Vietnam has proven to be an increasingly
popular destination for British tourists to spend their summer,
according to a report by the UK Post Office Travel Money.
7. Nose He Didn't
If you haven't seen this story, I caution you to tread lightly.. as its pretty disturbing. The funny thing is, its probably the 1,000th most disturbing thing Dan has looked at on the internet today.
Man grows nose on forehead
A Chinese man whose nose was left deformed in a car crash has grown a new one on his forehead.The 22-year-old known only as Xiaolian, was involved in the accident last year, but failed to seek treatment. As a result, his nose became infected leaving doctors unable to repair it. Instead, surgeons went with Plan B: grow a new one.
Doctors placed a saline bag cut into the shape of a nose beneath the skin on his forehead.Cartilage from Xiaolian's ribs was then implanted and left to grow over a period of nine months.
9 months? Like a baby! Aww.. sweet..
8. Best of Both Worlds
Something you may not know about Dan.. he actually was a pet owner. But not one of your stupid Dogs or Cats. My man had a hedgehog! (RIP Ziggy) So, Ironically, this video is making the rounds combining Dan's two favorite animals: Hedgehogs.. and Miley Cyrus
9. Full Show Thursday
For those of you who don't know, like me, Dan likes this lil band from VT called "The Phish." In fact at one point in the not so distant past, the two of us caught 15 consecutive shows, spread out over two tours and two years. Anyway, of all the shows we've been to together, perhaps the best one.. is the one Dan never saw. Dew to circumstances beyond his control, Dan missed the meet up outside of Deer Creek on July the 11th, 2000.. and in the process missed one of the best shows in the 30 year history of the band. Hey, shit happens, but in honor of that fateful day, let's relive some of those highlights..
A few vids are up
10. Happy Birthday Bitch!
But hey take it easy on the guy today.. the reason he likes to keep this under wraps is because he is really starting to show his age...
Photo courtesy of El Cid Graphic
who wants a fu man chu ride?
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