After several re-schedules, finally had my semi-annual cleaning at the dentist today. As if that pic of death wasn't enough (making it even more horrible, the woman doing the picking didn't exactly have the steadiest hands.. leaving me with a few puncture wounds in my gums) the radio was on a 102.5.. which as I learned today is no longer classical music here in Boston.. it is all country all the time. A half hour of that, while getting skewered, had me feeling like I was getting interrogated by Jack Bauer.
A few observations on the state of modern country, as that was my longest exposure to the "music" ever.. Every other song (at least) was about getting hammered. But, apparently if you are getting drunk "to forget things" this is better than just getting drunk for the sake of getting drunk. One tune I found particularly hilarious....
Samuel Jackson.. eat your heart out
I also learned that even country "music" has fallen victim to the curse of the auto-tune. And it's every bit as awful. I guess this one is what you call "a crossover hit", though I can't imagine anyone who likes any type of music enjoying this. Seriously, I know its painful but you need to listen to both of these tunes all the way through just for the sheer hilarity of it all.
In fairness..these lyrics are SUPER hip and trendy... if you're a 13 year old from 1995.
When you are done, you can cleanse your palate with this...
2. Flashback of the Week
I consider myself pretty knowledgeable about the Good Ol' Grateful Dead.. Two things I did not know: Sting once opened for them on a stadium tour. And two, Jerry sat in with him during his sets. Here's some audio from one such pairing.. Jerry on "Walking on the Moon?" Yes please!
3. The Answer My Friends
I love that she asks a follow up too. Proving once again that anchors never pay any attention to what's going on around them...
And in other News Bloopers News...
Talk about dedication! (of course, I'm sure they were both called in the next day, on their sick day, to work a double for breaking news coverage)
And this poor stoner is probably better off anyway. (Now he can finally score that dream job at Sam Goody)
4. When You Got That Glow
Great sneak peak on Grantland at a new "atuobiography" coming out of the late, great Rick Jams (bitch). Spoiler alert, this recap kinda gives away what I assume are most of the juicy details (for example, Rick Jams (bitch) fucked ELIZABETH SHUE..... ELIZABETH SHUE! And I assume this was back in the 80's when she was still super hot and basically the new IT girl. Also I assume this mean she was doing serious crack because I assume anyone who ever "hung out" with Rick James (bitch) was doing as much crazy shit as he was. Especially after reading things like...
He does time in the Navy brig, breaks out, and bounces from Buffalo back to Toronto, although all his old friends have already moved to California. Already a criminal in the eyes of the U.S. government, he becomes one by trade, helping a dealer rob a clothing store in exchange for drugs. He cuts out to Florida and then L.A., where Jim Morrison doses him with acid and future Manson Family murder victim Jay Sebring agrees to bankroll his new band; he’s back in Yorkville scouting talent in the clubs when the Toronto authorities pop him for the store robbery. He celebrates his 20th birthday in a Canadian jail.
And did I mention he was fucking ELIZABETH SHUE! This totally spoils so many of my fond childhood memories. WHYYYY, ELIZABETH!?!?!? WHYYYYYYYY!?!?
5. Full Show Firday
While we are here, that article references his 1981 concert at Long Beach.. which I happen to have downloaded a while back. It is every bit as awesome as billed.. especially the "Mary Jane." Only Rick James (bitch) can talk to his lighting director and say things like "TURN THE LIGHTS ON MY PEOPLE YOU SUCKA!" That's why he's Rick James (bitch)
For those interested.. (and that should be all of you) I threw the entire show up on my dropbox. Consider this your next Christmashanukkwanzika gift, suckaz.
6. Happy Anniversary
As you've probably heard, we just recently passed the 25th anniversary of the premiere of Seinfeld. As someone who takes approximately 56% of his vocabulary from that show (with an additional 20% from Curb) I've been loving reading all the retrospectives and write ups.. A quick collection.
My personal favorite, Hi Hi Heisenberg himeself...
"I had a big crush on Julia Louis-Dreyfus…when I saw the script for "The Labelmaker," I remember thinking, Oh, so I have to make out with her? Hmmm…[laughs]. The night that we shot that, she was terribly sick, and she kept apologizing, knowing full well that I would get her cold. Which I did…but my god, it was worth it!"
Who knew he was a stalker! My personal favorite on that list though, Bookman. I know it was only one episode, and it was very early on, but that dude was just hilarious in my opinion. I remember seeing some retrospective and him talking about how he kept making Jerry crack up, and that just makes his scenes even funnier to me now when I see it.
-Rolling Stone also put together one of those trendy lists they like to do.. 100 best characters (spoiler alert Elaine is #1)
My personal list:
For main characters, I'd say George has to be the best. His neuroses really drive the show, and again, looking back at it now, knowing that he's essentially playing Larry David makes it all the better.
For main characters, I'd say George has to be the best. His neuroses really drive the show, and again, looking back at it now, knowing that he's essentially playing Larry David makes it all the better.
For semi-recurring side characters, I'd have to say it's a tie between the Costanza's... with a slight nod going to Frank... for obvious reasons.
And for random one-off guest stars.. I mean how do you pick.. as I mentioned above, love Bookman, but the best one who wasn't on that list above.. the Mimbo. (Step off George, step off)
-And of course, Grantland's finest had his two cents.. (well actually 25 cents. That's a quarter actually isn't. oh shit it's late)
-Perhaps most interesting, from our Master of My Domain correspondant... The Lost Episode! (Ironically, called "the bet")
Ironically, there were some other episodes that did "tackle issues" (just not the way those "very special episodes" of Blossom did) (whoa!)
7. Warning!
Drunks are becoming smarter by the day. Pretty soon they will be self-aware.. and then we are all in trouble.
Man Allegedly Posed as TSA Screener to Pat Down Women at San Francisco Airport
A man was arrested for public drunkenness on Tuesday after he allegedly posed as a Transportation Security Administration screener at San Francisco International Airport and directed women to a private area for pat downs. Security staff reportedly stopped him after they realized two women were searched by the 53-year-old without a required female guard present.
“Airport law enforcement sources tell us the incident started when the man entered the security area wearing khaki pants, a blue polo shirt and blue rubber gloves — an outfit that might have been mistaken for those worn by screeners with the private Covenant security firm,” reported The San Francisco Gate. “Authorities are investigating whether the man should be booked on other counts, such as false imprisonment.”
I mean, for a drunk guy, he seemed to really have put a lot of thought into this. I'd say it was pre-meditated. I do have to wonder though, did he buy those rubber gloves, or did he lease them with an option to buy?
8. The Truth Revealed
As I always suspected, those stupid ass "Myers-Briggs" tests.. essentially meaningless. I remember taking this thing in junior high or high school and thinking, damn I could answer this question so many different ways. I put more stock into those buzzfeed tests. Those things like totally GET ME man!
9. Where Are They Now?
The answer? Reuniting around the kitchen table for a massive box set that. While I dont think I need 26-DVD's of the show, I would absolutely 100% love to purchase this shit:
10. D'oh They Didn't
I wonder how many DVD's the Simpsons will reach before they're done? It has to be close to a 100, right? Anyway, even though I haven't seen a new episode in years, this sounds like an unbelievably awesome time.
'The Simpsons' Live Show With Orchestra Coming to Hollywood Bowl
The Simpson family has been everywhere over the course of 25 years and more than 500 episodes, but this September they'll appear live on stage for the first time. The Simpsons Take the Bowl will hit the Hollywood Bowl on September 12th, 13th, and 14th for three special shows hosted by Simpsons cast member Hank Azaria — the man behind every Springfieldian from Apu Nahasapeemapetilon to Moe Szyslak — and a number of special guests.
Azaria will be joined by the familiar voices of Nancy Cartwright and Yeardley Smith, who voice Bart and Lisa Simpson, respectively, as well as a bevy of beloved Simpsons guest stars including Jon Lovitz, Beverly D’Angelo and "Weird Al" Yankovic (more guests will be announced in the future). Series creator Matt Groening will also be on hand to regale the crowd with behind-the-scenes anecdotes.The Simpson family has been everywhere over the course of 25 years and more than 500 episodes, but this September they'll appear live on stage for the first time. The Simpsons Take the Bowl will hit the Hollywood Bowl on September 12th, 13th, and 14th for three special shows hosted by Simpsons cast member Hank Azaria — the man behind every Springfieldian from Apu Nahasapeemapetilon to Moe Szyslak — and a number of special guests.
For the event, the Hollywood Bowl will be transformed into a immersive world that brings the town of Springfield to life. Along with live performances from the various guests, selected scenes from the show's 25 seasons, as well as never-before-seen clips, will be shown on the Bowl's big screen while the Hollywood Bowl Orchestra provides live musical accompaniment.
Anyone who lives in the are should definitely check it out... Sounds like it will be the coolest thing to happen at the Hollywood Bowl since....
11. Awwww.. You Don't Want Cable Anymore?
You've probably heard this by now, but if not, definitely worth a listen. We've all been this dude on the other line with (Insert Cable Company Provider Here), but I doubt anyone has this horror story. Though I will say, as much as the "Customer Service" Rep is a douche, the customer is kinda an asshole too.
Listen To A Comcast Rep Torture Customers Trying To Cancel
Posted: Updated:
We all know that it takes strength to call a utility or telecom. But the patience of two customers was seriously tested recently when they had the audacity to contact Comcast and make a simple request.
Writer Veronica Belmont and her husband Ryan Block, a product manager at AOL (parent company of The Huffington Post), called Comcast last week to disconnect their service. The couple planned to switch to another cable and Internet provider, but the customer service representative who handled their call had no intention of letting them do so.
He began asking me why we switched and that he would get us a better deal. I said, again “No, thank you, we’ve already switched, I just need to turn off the service in the old place.” It went back and forth like that for another five minutes. At one point I actually pleaded with him, “Please, I don’t want to get into a back-and-forth, our minds are made up and we just need to cancel.” He wouldn’t relent.
So Belmont handed the phone to Block.
"Overhearing the conversation, I knew this would not be very fun," Block wrote on SoundCloud. "What I did not know is how oppressive this conversation would be. Within just a few minutes the representative had gotten so condescending and unhelpful I felt compelled to record the speakerphone conversation on my other phone."
(Warning: This conversation may cause anger, teeth grinding and an all-consuming sense of frustration.)
(Click link above for audio)
And Of course, South Park did it first.
12. Guess Who's Back
Last but not least.. and speaking of being 13 years old... one of my childhood idols is back in a big way.. Weird Al just released his 14th! (14th!) album... and he's still got it! Not only can the man write some mean parody lyrics, he's also apparently a marketing genius! Who knew?
Not sure which of the new ones I like better, but, needless to say this week has led to a renaissance of his older material on my ipod.
Now, if you will excuse me I am going to dust of my Nintendo and play some Super Mario Bros. Peace out yo!
-Z
Dude! I'm totally going to go to one of those Simpsons show at the Bowl! I'll let you know how it is...
ReplyDeleteawesome! I am jealous.. take some video!
ReplyDelete