1. The Best of the Best of the Best Of
So many retrospectives.. so lil time..
(ok, maybe too much time.. my personal favorites below/in parenthesis)
(Yes, this guy made the list)
(Although, really.. I think this is quite appropriate.. for all ages)
The time Beyoncé gave us a double nip slip at the Super Bowl
(Ok, thats nice. But have you ever looked at a Stellar Explosion.... on weed?!?!)
Stellar Explosion
(So many good ones, but you just can't beat one last parting shot from outgoing Mayor Mumbles...
“We’ll be rooting hard to bring back the World Series Cup to Boston ...”
(Hard to really beat just about any line from the last run of BB... but somehow, old friend Pete Campbell did it...)
Geraldo Rivera Wearing His Mustache and a Towel
"70 is the
new 50," Geraldo Rivera announced when he posted a selfie to Twitter.
Unsurprisingly, he soon deleted the photo from Twitter.
(It really is such a magical place, isn't it? Literally, all 40 of these are just amazing.. but.. if I had to pick only one to write home about... )
2. Good Oral
Just when you thought you knew everything you ever needed to know about "Baby's Got Back" along comes a Very Special Oral History.
1st, let's refresh our memories, shall we?
‘And I Cannot Lie’: The Oral History of Sir Mix-a-Lot’s ‘Baby Got Back’ Video
America received the ultimate booty call on May 7, 1992, courtesy of Seattle rapper Sir Mix-a-Lot and his song “Baby Got Back.” Since its release through legendary rap-rock producer Rick Rubin’s Def American label, the up-tempo track — which spent five weeks at No. 1 and was the second-best-selling single of 1992, after Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” — has become our national anthem of ass, spawning innumerable parodies, cover versions (most notably Jonathan Coulton’s viral 2005 version), and references, including on Friends and in Shrek and Charlie’s Angels movies. The song’s long-lasting success owes greatly to its winking video, which, aside from featuring Sir Mix-a-Lot dancing atop a giant derrière and countless buttocks-related visual puns, generated a healthy amount of buzz when MTV banned it and fans, including Bruce Springsteen, countered that it offered a far more realistic glimpse at the female form than other music videos of the day. As part of our micro oral histories week, Vulture corralled Rubin, Sir Mix-a-Lot (real name: Anthony Ray), the video’s director Adam Bernstein (also of Breaking Bad fame), and others to bring you the story behind the behind-centric classic.
***
Amylia Dorsey-Rivas (voice artist, “Baby Got Back”): My background is such that being a woman of color — I’m half-Mexican, half-black, and have always been curvy — was not appreciated at all. Where I grew up, in the suburbs of Seattle, if you weren’t built like Paris Hilton you weren’t appreciated. I worked at a modeling agency as a teenager, and I taught hair makeup and runway classes to six-foot-tall girls who weighed 90 pounds. But I didn’t get much work, and neither did anyone who looked like me. You could have the highest cheekbones in the world, but if you were a little more broad at the beam, forget it. The kind of thing that women in my position went through made Mix angry. He’d say “I don’t understand why you can’t get modeling work,” and I’d say “Look behind me.” This was my experience that he was writing about.
So.. yeah.. he did it all for love! Awwww!
3. Team Coco
Apparently, I need to start watching Conan again.. because he has been on fire lately.
4. Headline of the Week
Pretty self-explanatory...
Blind man in subway fall caught in bizarre love triangle
5. Happy Birthday To Keith
And special thanks to @samcmlaird for posting this gem..
6. Surgeon of the Year
House MD...eat your heart out.
Hand surgically grafted to ankle ahead of reattachment
Xiao
Wei's severed right hand is seen attached to his ankle before the
reattachment surgery at Xiangya Hospital in Changsha, Hunan province, in
this December 4, 2013 handout photo provided by Xiangya Hospital,
Central South University.
REUTERS
A
Chinese man’s right hand was grafted to his leg in a rare procedure to save the
limb.
The
man, Xiao Wei, had his right hand severed in an accident while working at a
factory. Reuters reports the hand was grafted to his leg for a month in order
to perform reattachment surgery Dec. 4, 2013 at Xiangya Hospital in Changsha,
Hunan province.
An
image circulated by the hospital Dec. 4 shows the man’s hand attached to his
ankle before his reattachment procedure.
“His
injury was severe. Besides ripping injuries, his arm was also flattened. We had
to clear and treat his injuries before taking on the hand reattachment
surgery,” his doctor told photo agency Rex Features.
7. News Blooper of the Week
We've all been there.. unfortunately this poor bastard had his mic on when he did..
(UPDATE: He has since been fired. Probably a good thing)
8. Cover of the Week
Great news for music fans, Sharon Jones is back and she's not fucking around.
9. Fern-tastic
Guess who else is back.. everyone's favorite talk show host...Just in time for the holidays!
10. Rob Ford Stories of the Week
Nope. He's not going quitely. And that's a wonderful thing.
Not only does he like crack, he also likes the spleefs as well.. apparently..
Rob Ford Dancing With A Reggae Band In The Middle Of City Council
And just when he jiggled and wriggled his way back into your hearts...
Rob Ford: Women just want money
If there’s one thing that citizens of North America have learned this year, it’s that no one should ever take advice from Rob Ford. But that’s not about to stop the continent’s most embarrassing mayor from opening his mouth.
Ford weighed in with gift giving tips for husbands and boyfriends during his weekly appearance on DC radio station 106.7 FM The Fan’s “Sports Junkies,” reports the National Post.
“Women love money,” the disgraced public servant said. “Give ‘em a couple thousand bucks and they are happy.”
It’s advice that Ford himself follows whenever he needs to get a gift for his own wife, the publicity shy Renata Ford.
“At the end of the day, she wants her cash, so I give her a nice
check and we’re all happy,” the Torontonian said. “She says ‘Honey, I
want cash.’”
I dunno, he may be a crackhead..but he's makin' a lotta sense there..
11. The End is Nigh
Just when you thought the year in music couldn't get any weirder... Justin Bieber went to Phish (an oral history.. no pun intended)..
And THESE GUYS got elected into the RnR Hall of Fame.. (Although, full disclosure, this was probably the most played song on my ipod this year for some reason.. )
In all seriousness.. Bieber and his fans getting turned onto Phish cannot be a good thing for the World's Greatest Band as they wrap up their 30th year. I fear for the phuture. I honestly do.
12. Throwback of the Week
If this doesn't get you fired up.. then there's something wrong with you.
13. Full Show Friday
Dangerous Minds has unearthed what they're calling "the Ultimate Pink Floyd Bootleg"... if you're looking for a bugged out Christmas.. well, this here's for you.
‘The Man’ and ‘The Journey’ are two longform experimental song cycles
that were performed by Pink Floyd during several of their 1969 concerts.
The suites consisted largely of numbers that would appear on the More soundtrack and Ummagumma
(and confusingly some already released songs with different titles)
knit together with onstage activities like cannons being fired, pink
smoke bombs exploding, a roadie dressed as a gorilla running around in
the audience, the band being served tea and making a wooden table from
scratch!
When the live show, “More Furious Madness from the Massed Gadgets of
Auximenes,” debuted at the Royal Festival Hall on April 14th, the Floyd
employed a joystick operated quadraphonic sound system they nicknamed
the “Azimuth Coordinator.” The Azimuth Coordinator was a multi-speaker
pan pot system—operated by keyboardist Rick Wright from the
stage—whereby the sound could be routed 360 degrees around the venue.
The original system was stolen after a concert in the Queen Elizabeth
Hall, so a second system was built for the Royal Festival Hall
performance.
Parts of this show were recorded for a Top Gear radio program a month
later. In Amsterdam, on September 17th, a crisp soundboard-recorded
performance at the Concertgebouw was broadcast by VPRO radio. There were
originally plans to release “The Man” and “The Journey” as a live
album, but this was scrapped ultimately. A pre-FM tape of the Amsterdam
show slipped into circulation, has been widely bootlegged and is a fan
favorite (I have a ridiculous amount of live Pink Floyd bootlegs and I reckon this one is near the very top. It’s deliriously good)
Here is the show on YouTube. High quality versions can easily be
found on several bootleg blogs and torrent trackers by searching for
“Complete Concertgebouw 1969.” If you’ve never heard this one before,
it’ll blow your doors off.
14. This Iiiiiz Christmas Music
There's no band like Megadeth for the Holidays
15. Most Wonderful Cards of the Year
So many good ones.. but as I posted earlier this week on The Social Network.. this one is truly amazing.. I wish we had thought of this for our card this year... oh well, there's always next time...
Well, thats all for this year, gang. Thank you all for coming, we'll see you back here in 2014.. but until then, let me be the first Jew to say to you... Merry Christmas you filthy animals.
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